Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Disneyland: Zombie Deathtrap

I am heading to Disneyland. My family and I LOVE Disney. It is not the perfect organization, but we know the in & outs of the parks and tend to enjoy the films. Wall-E is MY movie, not the kids. Hell, I enjoy picking apart the "Why Disney was horrible" lists. Believe it or not, a majority of the issues can be solved by better vacation planning and knowing what you are getting yourself into. That being said......

Disneyland is a Deathtrap in a Zombie attack. This is a pure ZBA zone. Tightly packed and ridiculously slow moving - humans are turned into cattle. How many times have I gotten stuck behind a slow moving pack of tourists blocking entire pathways (meant to allow 15 to 20 people walking side by side)? I can't count that high. Thankfully the other half and I are adept and intimidating these slow mover out of the way, and finding gaps large enough to pass through.

This reminds me to bring up a warning to said slow moving shamblers - In a zombie outbreak I just have to be faster than you are. Second note. I already am faster so enjoy the horde coming behind me.

I try not to be too paranoid about Zombies, but for anyone who has waited in line for the Rodger Rabbit Ride - understand the fear that dark shadow and strange noises can bring. That is one creepy kids ride. Typically Zombies based on disease will find that Amusement parks are probably some of the greatest places to strike. While they can't make a choice to go there more than any other - the combination of limited escape paths, crowded conditions, and screams and loud noises already being common create a disaster scenario. The crowd will take time to have the warning filter through. Even longer will be the tossing away of disbelief. Most won't believe it until the zombie horde reaches them. At that point - they don't have many options for escape.

Strangely enough, Two locations appear to be safer than the others - Tom Sawyer's Island (since it is surrounded by water) and Toontown - Since it has a full separating gate. Additionally, these are two of the further points from the entrance of the park, so they will have the longest warning of any point. Of the two locations - Toontown actually could survive awhile since there are basic refreshments available. However there are dozens of back-access points for Toontown - each one is a possible breach point for the horde of now undead vacationers massing at the gates. I would rate this one as having potential - but being much riskier.

Tom Sawyers Island, surrounded by a narrow moat, has a number of spots you can hide in, and if the Zombies are unable to swim (cross your fingers) you can make quick rush's for supplies at the Hungry Bear restaurant across the water. While you will get wet on the way there - Hungry Bear's is right on the water front, and is next door to the damn Canoe rental. Coming back with supplies is MUCH easier if you have a method to transport it. Brush up on your canoe skills prior to attempting this trip. Zombies may try to attack you in the water. Just pray they cannot.

However through all of this, I try to maintain my sanity. I will survive and continue to write this. As I walk the park I may just be spending my time calculating how fast I can get to Tom Sawyers Island - at least it is near my favorite Restaurants in the French Quarter. Thank god for that....

Wednesday, July 10, 2013

Terminal Defense Position: Vardo

Been awhile since I covered a Terminal Defense Position, but with the absurdity of the location I found on Google Maps yesterday just calls for one. The islands of Vardoya, or the town of Vardo, Norway.

Limited Approach
I guess this location should be called - "Not much farther North is possible" given its extreme location. This is probably a location that will be reserved for Norwegian and Swedish refugees of the Zombie take over of the world. It is seriously out of consideration for 95% of the global population. This pair of islands are actually just off the East Coast of one of Norway's most northern territories. Aside from a boat in the presumably rough waters of the Artic, the only other option to reach the island is a single tunnel. As far as proximity to humanity goes - this place will probably survive with its population intact. You probably even have some allies that can help you to survive. These people are pretty much all there is for miles (or Kilometers as they would say). That, and the Gulf Current keeps this place relatively mild, considering how far north this location is. In this regard - they score an easy 10/10.

This one is a bit tricky. Vardo is beyond the Artic Tree line so you won't be growing any trees for fuel - it also puts building supplies at a premium. A survivor here would have to be careful that they didn't abuse their limited resources. An advantage this location has, is the proximity to the Norwegian Oil and Gas fields. While that means you will want to be careful when you go out exploring - it means that you should have a large supply of fuel to use to stay warm. In addition to the oil and gas fields - this is also a major fishery. If you don't like fish, you will soon learn to appreciate it because that is about all you will have to eat if the globe is overrun by zombies. While this location has some benefits for resources for food and fuel - it is a limited location in other major areas of necessity. 6.5/10

Available Skill Sets

This is a bit more limited than other locations - since this is not a major city, nor is it relatively close to an area filled with highly skilled labor. What this place does have is survival skills, and a ridiculously stubborn toughness that should probably be incredibly helpful in a fight. For goodness sake these people live above the Artic Tree Line! A "hot" day is in the 50's (F). That being said, while your stay will not be luxurious in any sense - you will survive, and eventually prosper. Hell - they actually have fortifications on the Island which could be useful in a pinch. 7/10

Overall Scored
This location scores well on in areas that determine true survival, but it is a really distant location. While there may not be many ZBA's nearby, anyone wanting to get here to this location could be facing some pretty extensive journeys through what would become "wild" lands with some of the harshest and most beautiful terrain the world has to offer. However, it is at the exact end of a highway that flows through the entire continent of Europe which helps with navigation and travel. Resupply will eventually need to occur for lumber and other supplies, but at least you will have a safe base to retreat to. This location gets a 30/40.

Friday, June 28, 2013

Last Night Was Hell

I don't know how the rest of you spent your night, but mine was spent in utter hell. Pure, unfettered, putrid, horrifying hell.

No, I did spend my night stuck watching Star Trek V or videos of Jar-Jar Binks. I had a night of one long
continuing nightmare about zombies. Hour after painful hour, of undead mayhem.

When these nights occur - which are thankfully few and far between, my mind gets stuck in a groove. I will enter a dream sequence that I know is a dream - but I am so afraid of zombies it overpowers my ability to Lucid dream. What I can do, is wake myself up. So my night is spent in the dream world running in terror, sometimes dying, mostly waiting with apprehension and discomfort wondering why this dream won't stop.

How often do we have dreams we want to continue that just won't? No one can say they have not woken up and yearned to go back and finish what their dream had going on for them. Does it work? Hardly ever! Your mind is a jerk who snatches away that joyous endeavor like a bully steals your lunch money.

On an aside - having grown up poor and generally getting free lunch - I have no idea what it is like to have my lunch money stolen. Poverty for the win! ....Shit...

Getting back to my main topic here - my mental torture. So I spend these nights balancing between two bad situations. If I stay away I will be even more exhausted the next day. I risk having a migraine all day, being unable to drive safely, or not being able to enjoy my day because I am spending it rubbing my eyes and trying not to cry at the knots in my back. If I go back to sleep unknown horrors await me. I have been eaten,  chased and trapped with the grim horde battering their way in. I have witnessed thousands attacked and turned by the undead. No seriously - thousands of people. Many times they are people I care about - or their arch-type.

The struggle goes on and on. Fall asleep - maybe it will be different. Wake up because it was no different. Feel so very tired. Let myself close my eyes - yup - more undead there. Open my eyes... You get the idea. It is like being bombarded with your greatest fear both awake and asleep.

That is what is even more horrible about it. Because I get so tired after a night of this - my brain finds it harder and harder to separate the reality from the dream. Even more so when the dream world uses real world places I know to torture me. I wake up and I begin to fear going back to sleep. Every little noise is a zombie sneaking towards trying to eat me or my family. You know how much I freak out knowing my daughter would have to face that? It makes me want to install those awesome steel window covers from "I am Legend". Not sure how one we even get those - it must be a custom iron working job.

So yes, today I am tired, I am exhausted, and I am left with another night of tortured dreams filled with undead attacks. I can only hope that the paranoia that is left behind is not too debilitating today and I can not freak out at every sound that happens to occur near me.

Monday, June 17, 2013

I am Almost Free....

...of trailers for World War Z. Frankly, I cannot be more excited for this movie to be in theaters so I can move on with my movie watching. It is getting more and more annoying trying to watch movies without this playing.

Look, I like movies, and I love movie trailers, but having Zombie jump out at me every time I try to go out and enjoy myself is just, well, frustrating. I am glad that this movie has been made - because what I know of the book is all good - in a literary sense. While the movie speeds up the infection spread incredibly I think that this film may turn out to be pretty good for those who go see it. I will not be seeing it - I frankly don't think I could survive seeing it sober. And to drink to be able to sit through it - well I don't know if there is enough scotch I could sneak into the theater to make that possible.

I know this is all me, and it is my problem. You just have not felt the apprehension and the tension my body experience with a zombie film. I have written about how I couldn't make it through Zombieland - and that is not an exaggeration. my heart raise and blood pressure increased to a point I could feel it in my hands and feet. I was in full-animal-fear-response mode. You can't fake that sort of response. Even as my fiance urges me to confront the fear and see the movie with her I will be unable to do so. I don't think my heart is strong enough to handle two hours of near heart attack level of pressure. If it could - I would probably run a marathon afterwards.

So all of you out there heading out to see the movie - I wish you the best of evenings, but please - leave me out of it so I can enjoy the rest of my movies this summer.

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Fear and the Bedroom

My fiance occasionally enjoys toying with me and my fear. This can be especially annoying in the bedroom as we get ready for bed because it counter acts any plans for being comfortable. She will growl and be silly about the entire thing. She will even pretend to try and bite me like a zombie would. Laughing the entire time.
This always backfires on her, and ruins my night. After she is done mocking me, she usually wants to cuddle or be close. This is where it backfires - why the hell would I let her near my neck at that point?
I get so anxious I can barely lay down next to her, let alone let her be near my neck. My skin crawls and I almost have to leave the room.  It is a real mood killer to think any thoughts about zombies. Just imagine how compromising a situation that would be to have a person turn when you are holding them tight. Really flipping sucky is what it would be.
I know the fear is crazy but it still causes me problems. This is just another hilarious part of how this fear works out.

Saturday, June 1, 2013


It is this sort of literature that prepares people for the zombie apocalypse.

Thursday, May 16, 2013

Society is Fragile - Deal with it.

It has been awhile since I wrote so I felt it important to write a significantly disturbing entry. Don't get me wrong, I have studied global maps and found some cool places for humanity to lay low while Zombies march unstoppably across vast continents of people/lunch. I have a number of locations picked out, and I hope to start a weekly series soon outlining these safe(r) havens. If you have a site you would like investigated for its survivability, just message me with the location and the coordinates for a Google Earth search and I will check it out. Lets go ahead and worry about all that later as I start on today's topic - how frail civilization really is.

Civilization exists in a careful and complex balance. Our society is a long line of carefully timed deliveries of raw goods and products that can be broken in a single spot with disastrous consequences for everything else. While this system works well and have some measures to maintain equilibrium - the system as a whole is very delicate. This is a natural tendency of any system geared towards greater complexity that homeostasis is more difficult to maintain. For those of you not familiar with the term - homeostasis is the ability of a system to maintain itself against changes circumstances. For example when it is hot out you sweat to keep cool. All processes have some level of capacity for adjusting to changing circumstances.

Our society though, can fall apart more quickly than other systems that exist if pressure is added in just the right spot. Since my generation loves lists - let's make one with the soft points of society.

1. People: Humans are the very creature that made society - however we are not the only animals on this planet to create functioning societies with different levels of success. There are birds and small mammals that engaged in group activities for safety - Meerkats watch out for predators and warn their group of danger. Some species of bird sound alarms to their brethren to avoid danger. No one can doubt the organic avoidance of predators by flocks of bird or schools of fish as they move around. My favorite society building creature of all, the mighty Ant, is it a stable practice of some species to farm livestock in the form of aphids  or grow their food (a specific type of mold) on the rotting mass they purposely create inside their hive.

Humans are a weak point because we can be confused, we can become diseased, or used against our peers in many different ways. Additionally, we are very apt to throw our peers to the wolves if we think it will save our own hide. We rob each other - even more so to survive in a disaster. Fact is, once something doesn't go a certain way we will stoop to utterly depraved levels of violence to finish the job of destroying society in record time.

2. The Digital Age: You I-Phone or Android device will be the death of us all. Not directly, but your reliance on technology is a very disturbing aspect of a both the help and the danger technology poses. You see, every time we develop a tool or a piece of technology that does a job for us - we take away the need of that knowledge ourselves. This is not a specifically bad process - by centralizing water processing we can clean a lot more water, and free me up to work harder at my job. And maybe not so hard boiling water to avoid dysentery. I have had it - it sucks. The reason that technology is both a help and a bane is that it because we no longer need to do certain tasks - we are losing the ability to do them at all.

Just as a test of this, attempt to recall the five telephone numbers for the first people you would call in an emergency. Don't use your phone, your Facebook, your Google Account, MSN, or anything else. Just from memory. Chances are you see these numbers every day when you call them, text them. Maybe even when you post to their wall online. Recalling phone number in the apocalypse will be a moot point - but the point of  losing skills that were once used every day is. I have great respect for anyone who seeks to maintain a basic skill that technology cannot take away - that person is worth their weight in gold in any disaster because they become more resistant to harmful circumstance. I have some basic wood working skills - I just recently made a gorgeous table. However in an apocalypse I understand enough to build things, to repair wooden structures. I have relatives who are plumbers, electricians, masons - the works. That skill set means that I have less to relearn in case those skills are needed. Tell me: what use is Paris Hilton in a disaster? Not a damn bit of good.

3.  Oil/Fossil Fuels: This is not just a general "fossil fuels bad" comment. In fact Fossil Fuels are incredibly useful - it is why their products have pervaded our lives. Coal is powering large swaths of our country. Oil is responsible for the plastics age. Trouble is that it took a REALLY long time to develop the system that uses oil. Coal is hard to transport without other fossil fuels. Without Oil - Coal will only move slowly and in much smaller quantities to where it would be burned. Without a lot of that coal - there is very little power to make more oil into fuel. Hell, a lot of the easily accessible oil that can be reached without power is now gone. We are now using fossil fuels at a higher rate to get more fossil fuels - I think you start to see the cycle here. Take out a refinery in a hurricane, or an Earthquake and instantly millions of dollars in costs will appear. First the repair of the facility, then the market shortage, more fuels need to be used to get back to the original production point. It just keeps adding up.

At the end of the day what is even worse - These resources are humanly finite. The amount theoretically produced in a human lifespan is so much smaller than what a single person uses, let alone an entire planet. Not mention that these fossil fuels are created from the plant and animals we already paved over with cement - how can more oil or coal be made unless we have swaths of forest and animals being buried to become the coal and oil?

4. The Internet: Humans are social creatures - but we are also animals. We are the dominant animals of the planet because we developed certain tendencies that kept us alive in dangerous situations. However these genetic traits are now also very dangerous because they can be triggered at a much faster rate. Herd animals will stampeded if provided the right circumstances - it is a flight response to danger. Humans are also prone to a fight or flight response - both of which can reach so much further with technology than without. In 1950, if a person was paranoid that someone was watching him and lost his mind as he started to run screaming down the street chances are no one would ever hear about it. Maybe a few people were get scared and run with him or in another direction.  The Internet allows what can be called the Fight or Flight response to be sent out to every corner of the Earth in microsecond. One persons panic can suddenly become the panic of a planet. It is like triggering a stampede across the planet instead of an isolated valley - because of a terror that is still the same size.

Additionally - the Internet is so widely used and manipulated that it is as dangerous as many other elements of our lives. Stocks can plunge on a rumor started by some stranger spouting off in a chat room in Pakistan. Armies can come to blows and riots start because of a fake news report sent out to an email address. Who here can count how many times Morgan Freeman has died this year alone because humans can be sent along delusional paths so easily. Maybe this should be rolled into Humans as well - but it still is important on its own for the havoc it can cause.

Are there more" I can certainly guarantee that there are. Civilization is only as resilient as its subsequent parts - and we are really flimsy at times. One single point of pressure, if pressed at the right moment *cough* Solar Flare *cough* can send everything we know into a tail spin. Don't panic, but be aware that as Atlas stands there with the Earth on his shoulders, that sometimes the strength of one person is all that stands between you and the collapse of civilization. IF that doesn't make you thankful for what we have - I am not sure what else would.

Thursday, May 2, 2013

Hyperactive Agency Detection

I know, another wonderful entry that revolves around, dare I say it, science explaining fear. specifically in my case, a fear of Zombies. I was inspired earlier today by web comic artist Maki Naro of Specifically his comic on "Things that go Bump in the Night". Yes Maki, I plugged you. Deal with it.

What is the Hyperactive Agency Detection? (also known as HADD in some circles) According to wikipedia and a short google search into it - it is a part of the brain that give humans the capacity (and propensity) to assume that some unknown noise or movement is a specific acting agent. Example - you see a shadow and think someone is after you. Believe it or not - it can be mathematically shown to be more valuable for our brains to keep this biological instinct than to let it go away. Case in point: ancient man assuming a Sabertooth is behind a bush and being wrong is a lot safer than not assuming a dangerous animal is there and being eaten. The guy/gal that was paranoid lives while the hopelessly-safe-feeling idiot is lunch.

Why should I include this in a blog about zombies? For this part of the brain to actually affect human behavior, it has to activate a fear inside the mind. One that will shock and terrify and really grab the attention of the poor soul having the reaction. I make it no secret to those who know me that I have very few fears - I am concerned about certain things, but real active fears are very small for me. I have been through a lot of hells - physically, emotionally - all of it. I have looked on the face of evil and have been tempered by it in some ways.

More simply put - my mind has to seek out the best way of scaring me to react and zombies happen to be it. They are a fear that circumvents all of my knowledge, personal strength, and capacity to rely on others in any form - they call into question my capacity to survive unlike anything else out there. Demons? Dragons? Robbers? Some super-villain?  I am not that concerned - I create this stuff for fun inside my mind. Sadly, my brain has created my zombie fear in order to maintain the ability to spook me into acting safer. Of course it sucks that when I am out at night I am watching for the start of the zombie horde, any staggering individual is gauged for optimum response while avoiding being scratched or bitten or breathed on. This is the price I pay, in some ways, to stay sane.

And that - is just a fascinatingly crazy fact about the human mind. Sometimes crazy helps it maintain a grip on reality.

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

I Hate Diseases

Similar in nature to my Zombie fear, I have a slight paranoia about pandemics. Nowhere near the level of panic I get when Zombies some out to play thankfully. I am not debilitated by the appearance of someone with a cold or flu. However I find it disturbing how dirty people can be, and how easily it really is for large numbers of people to be killed by a tiny little virus.

Maybe this fear has re-surfaced because I watched a BBC documentary on the Bird Flu - not my best way to spend my ultra-early morning but what can I say. Word of advice to anyone I know who travels to southeast Asia - don't eat a damn thing. ever, like anywhere. In fact, bring your own medical masks and oxygen supply. I will suggest an air scrubbing re-breather system used for cave divers. Seeing the images of how they prepare their food makes me want to burn it all to the ground, and as Monk would say, "..and burn the ashes!"

Unlike many of my peers, I am actually planning what I would do to save my family in the event of a killer-super bug being released into the general population. Am I stockpiling weapons and ammo - no. Unlike most people I have other options to defend myself. However it does mean that I do think of what would need to be done, in the event of a disaster, to get my family out of the city and into the safety of the countryside. Bad news is, I live in one of the largest Metropolitan areas in the country (goddamn it!). Good news is that most of the year it is a scorching dry-hot mistress of total merciless proportions, making it tougher for diseases not from around here to survive(yay!) Bad news is (wait more bad news?) most of these super-bugs will come from tropical regions so the heat won't help so much. I guess having a disease outbreak in Greenland is a much better scenario than the tropics.

Anyways, given the capacity for such a deadly outbreak to occur, I have often wondered why more isn't done to prepare for a total quarantine of the country? Why do we not have self-sufficient zones established that will allow for people to limit the spread of the disease? Are we, as a modern people, so worried about offending people, that we can't make the callous decision that in order for the greater good we need to be prepared to draw lines in the sand and protect as many as we can? Because of the nature of disease, its spread will be nearly impossible to stop, so perhaps we just try not to stop it all because the cost for a small chance on a return on that investment is so slim? The rioting alone would cost lives - though why any person would go out in a crowd of people in close proximity to one another when a deadly virus breaks out is beyond me. I am sorry, the moment you tell me that this years flu is killing people - you won't be seeing my ass outside. Screw that. I will email my unhappiness in. I will text and tweet my anger at the "system" doing everything it can to protect as many as possible.

I think at the end of the day, the outbreak of a disease that can kill is just beyond the ability of people to comprehend. The first world has lived so sheltered from the dangers that exist, for so long, we can't actually face the grim reality that we live in the midst of. It falls into a category of problems and concerns that a select few choose to address, that a select few look to the future and know that they work hard to prevent this sort of problem, so most of us can stay happy in our bubbles with our families and friends. While I am thankful that we have people working silently to fight off the darkness that threatens us all, I am aware enough  to understand how much we have to thank them for.

Monday, January 28, 2013

World War Z

I went to go see a movie the week before last, a silly film of no real consequence (or quality for that matter) and I was greeted by a World War Z preview. Now, my fiance who does not keep up with movies as much as I do (though my knowledge is still pretty lacking at times) had no clue what was coming up when I suddenly covered my eyes, plugged by ears and starting humming.

I knew the moments Brad Pitt showed up on screen stuck in a traffic jam in a city, with his family - that this did not bode well. First, I only knew of one Brad Pitt film coming up. Second - they were stuck in a traffic jam - one of the most inopportune moments for a Zombie strike to occur. Maybe I should write up a ZBA analysis of Traffics jams in the future. Anyways - I am trying to hum through this preview and of course, since it is a movie theater I cannot drown out the sounds of the film. I am just thankful there were a minimum of screams from people becoming lunch.

Some people have taken to trying to disprove Zombies as of late - which is somewhat disturbing. I don't see why you would have to spend time talking about how something is impossible if it really was. Additionally - there are existing parasitic viruses that would actually make a zombie disease quite possible. Truth be told there are parasites that will take control of an animal and direct it to do things that help it spread.

One of the more entertaining episodes of Fringe covers this well. There is a virus that infects a man, and the team is trying to figure out how the virus spreads because it seems to only attempt to spread at certain times. Come to find out, the virus is semi-sentient in a way because the virus takes advantage of its host's senses and understands when there are new people to infect. Once it has a larger group to infect, the virus will turn its host into a virus spewing biological weapon thus expanding its reach. It doesn't become contagious based on time or development - but on proximity to other carriers. Now that is a pretty vicious bug.

Back to the movie - that my fiance wants me to see. I am not going to see the movie - I don't think I want to have a heart attack, especially since a majority of films adopt the "jumping out as a method to scare" tactic. I like higher quality terror, jumping out at you doesn't scare you - it proves that your reflexes work. anyone who doesn't jump has PTSD or is a likely candidate for extended nerve damage. I prefer quality slow, gnawing terrors that come up inside your mind and leave you feeling horrified and questioning every shadow.

Come to think of it, that is kind of how my Zombie fear works isn't it?

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

I really Hope Zombies Can't Swim

I really hope Zombies can't swim. Seriously. Do you know how difficult it would be to stop the undead hordes if Zombies could swim? Probably just a shade below impossible, and would seriously restrict locations people could call safe havens. This would of course rely on the fact that aquatic animals would not eat them, or their water logged flesh would soak up water and they would sink into the dark depths of the ocean. There, their decomposed forms would be crushed into a wet mass of undead mush.

As long as a location can be successfully cut off or easily monitored it can remain a safe location. Even if standing water is removed as a barrier, there still remains rushing water, mountains, fire and sheer cliffs. Each of these can create hazards that the undead would be heavily challenged by. I mean, if you could build near one, having a constant flow of magma from a volcano would be a pretty impressive barrier. Granted - being that close to a volcano may not be the best location for long term survival. Volcano's tend to be a tad bit temper-mental in even the best circumstances.

Part of the difficult in preparing a zombie free zone that one can live in comfortably is the basic idea that as Zombies have become more common in media - their myths have changed. Initially zombies only sought out brains - but after a decade or two their palates grew into a general hunger for human flesh. After their hunger changed, then they began to change into more fearsome beasts. Now they can run, climb and turn into relatively powerful monkey-like creatures to terrify humanity. I have to assume these myths changed because of the American culture itself. How could a zombification disease spread in a country that has more than one gun for every single man, woman and child within its borders? Making Zombies more powerful makes that possible.

However this expansion of the genre has its drawbacks. The original zombie idea was an embodiment of a slow progressing rot, a slow death through overwhelming odds. The fear of the slow inevitable end of your life as you are faced with your mortality from those that are already passed on. That is an incredibly different fear than "Holy crap that rage-beast is going to try and gnaw my limbs off".

One theory on the development of Fears is that for some people they are manifestations of other incremental problems in their life. these fears are the way that the mind takes a single object or theme and puts all those different pieces into a single larger one. While this doesn't work for all cases, with some analysis of what a fear entails a person can reasonably figure out why someone is afraid of something.

I am aware enough of my fear, and who I am as a person to understand a large portion of my fear of zombies, and how it is different from other fears. I can see the path my mind followed to create the fear, and why at this point in my life, this manifestations of my fear is so powerful for me. It warrants a close inspection from anyone with any level of fear, as to why and how that fear came to be a part of you. Like it or not, that fear probably has a good reason to be there.