Zombie Nights

 

One of my greatest frustrations with my own mind comes from one of the greatest strengths – my ability to focus on something. My mind latches on and will refuse to let go of an idea or thought process until all possible outcomes and combinations are complete. When working on projects or new hobbies this is great. When I started researching Horology (clock making for those of us not wanting to Google it) within days I had a running concept of how to make the clock, and even had found plans for my first clock. This brain of mine is less of a friend when it latches on thoughts of zombies.

 

You guessed it, last night was another paranoid evening of thinking on the undead. I wonder if I would feel better just setting up a matrix of trip wires in the yard and house. I mean, it is not like my current residence can get any safer. The home has a security system that beeps every single time a door opens. You might assume that I would relax knowing that – but it doesn’t help because my mind is not sated with such simple solutions.

 

I have been paranoid that my mother in law may “turn” as they call it, in the middle of the night. You think in-laws are bad alive – imagine them as zombies. Ugh. It usually turns into the two halves of my brain having a running fight – trying to determine who has the better logic.

 

Fearful: “There is no telling if the house is safe”

Logical: “There were no zombies here fifteen minutes ago, you checked all the locks, and every window is closed.”

Fearful: “what is they sneak in. They could get past the door chime by climbing in a window!”

Logical: “The shambling, clumsy undead would have to break the window to get in. Even without the shambling – there is that whole ‘breaking the window’ part that gives you a warning.

Fearful: “Never underestimate them. They could be quiet, shambling, sneaky undead.”

Logical: “….Seriously?”

Reality: “You do realize there are no zombies right?”

Logical: “That is just what a zombie would want the world to think. I don’t trust that.”

Fearful: “Oh no, a zombie conspiracy?!?”

 

This is how my mind works. Notice how the “Logical” portion of my brain never tries to say that zombies don’t exist – it tries to deduce why were are only currently safe from the undead. So much for logic being any help what-so-ever.